


a flood of blood to the heart

by nykteris



Category: I.O.I (Band)
Genre: F/F, Fluff, otherwise known as me trying to rectify all the tragedy i write
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-01
Updated: 2016-05-01
Packaged: 2018-06-05 15:52:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,574
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6711436
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nykteris/pseuds/nykteris
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Somi’s just one of the lucky ones. (Or: an au where I.O.I never have to leave each other and continue to promote as one group and SeSom are girlfriends.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	a flood of blood to the heart

**Author's Note:**

> written for rina, because our incessant babbling and constant conversations (aha, passion pit reference) about sesom have inspired me to write this ♡ written for nikki too, just to prove i’m not a greek tragedy in the form of a human being (and to get her to ship sesom; also ty for watching over this, boi).
> 
> title is from "bloodflood" by alt-j.

****Somi hasn’t got a clue about love or what it really is. She doesn’t have a firm grasp on it, doesn’t understand it in all of its complexity and simplicity. At least not yet.

But hey, what the hell does any nineteen-year-old know about _anything_ , anyway?

Somi hasn’t got a clue about love, but Sejeong seems to love her and that’s enough to send her heart fluttering.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


When the other members ask her how it happened, all Somi can say is, “It just did.”

It’s not exactly wrong. If anything, it seemed inevitable that they would happen. They just went with the flow, allowing time to do its work and fate to do its thing, as cheesy as it sounds. Somi had never failed to catch the adoring gazes Sejeong reserved only for her, or the way Sejeong went an extra mile only and always for her, or the way she always spoke so fondly of her to everyone, even on live television. Somi had never been completely aware that she was doing anything of the sort until the other girls started pointing them out to her. Then came the teasing and wolf whistles, then the “God, you two are the worst” comments. It went on like that for the longest time (or maybe it just felt like that to Somi), the brushing of hands and the smiles reserved only for each other and the whispers meant only for each other’s ears, until it just...happened.

It’s the most unromantic and anti-climactic way to tell someone you like them. They had a month before comeback, which meant sleepless nights and the lack of will to live for the most part. It was four in the morning and they were the last two in the dance studio (“Leave room for Jesus,” Mina had said before rushing to avoid any form of retaliation from Somi), both tired and sweaty and a little out of it. What happens before is a haze to Somi, and she blames her lack of sleep for forgetting the details, but she remembers blurting “Unnie, I like you” and how her entire face went beet red when she realized what she had just said.

What happens after is the best part. She remembers the way Sejeong’s eyes had widened almost comically, remembers the slight part of her lips and the excruciating silence that followed. For a moment, she felt her heart sinking, and her mind was already prepping her for the rejection that could possibly follow. Then Sejeong tugged her closer until their bodies were pressed together, tiptoeing and softly pressing her lips against Somi’s. When she pulled away, her face flushed and set into a wide grin, she said, “I like you, too.”

As far as stories of romantic confessions go, this isn’t way up there with those overly dramatic ones. But there’s something that Somi likes about that, and she really wouldn’t have had it any other way.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


They keep it on the down low at first, especially around the other girls. They sneak quick pecks on the lips in between takes for CFs and variety shows, or hold hands under the dining table, and they always make it a point to be beside each other as much as possible. Of late, Sejeong has been spending more and more time in Somi’s shared room with Sohye, who gives them curious looks but shrugs it all off. The other girls do the same, passing off their behavior as the usual, dumb behavior they had all grown accustomed to. Somi senses that Nayoung might suspect something, given how she always narrows her eyes at the two when they’re together, but if their leader ever suspected anything, she doesn’t make any comments whatsoever.

One evening, when they are all alone in Sejeong’s room, Somi asks, “When are we gonna tell them?”

With her head resting on Somi’s shoulder, Sejeong replies, “Whenever you feel comfortable telling them.”

Somi smiles, warmth spreading through her chest. Of course Sejeong would answer that, of course she’d put Somi first.

Somi decides the next morning that she _is_ comfortable with telling the other members. She wants to, is dying to. They’re all gathered at the dining table, cereals and coffee and fruits before all of them. The TV is on, a news reporter reading out all the eight a.m. headlines, though no one is really listening; Nayoung leaves it on that channel for effect, and she says as much. The others are busy prodding their breakfast sleepily, yawning in between bites. Somi quietly eats her breakfast, waiting for Sejeong to take her seat right beside her.

“Why so quiet, maknae?” Yoojung asks from across the table, reaching in front of her for the milk carton.

Somi shrugs. “I’m still sleepy, is all.”

Five minutes later, Sejeong finally arrives. Her hair is still a little wet and her eyes are still puffy with sleep. She takes a seat beside Somi, rubbing her eyes. She opens her mouth to greet everyone good morning but is greeted instead by Somi’s lips on her own in a lingering kiss. The room falls silent, the eight o’clock news being the only sound in the background.

Somi pulls away, leaving a few inches between their faces, smiling. “Good morning, unnie.”

Sejeong stares at her, dumbfounded, but her own lips settle into a fond smile, her eyes warm and filled with adoration. Somi is used to that by now but she is still amazed that anyone could ever look at her with as much affection as Sejeong does.

“Well,” Chungha remarks, breaking the silence. “That certainly woke me up.”

Beside her, Chaeyeon calmly takes a sip of coffee and says, “For the record, I think you guys are adorable together.”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Sejeong is like a puppy, restless when Somi is gone for even just ten minutes, even more so when she’s gone for a prolonged period of time. And like a puppy once its human has come back, Sejeong perks up and happily rushes to Somi, enveloping her in a hug, burying her face in the crook of Somi’s neck.

“I’ve missed you,” she would whine.

Somi would laugh, her face flushing just the slightest tinge of pink. “I’ve only been gone an hour, unnie. It’s not that long.”

Sejeong would pout, looking up at her. By now, Somi is almost a whole head taller than her, and it’s something Somi always makes sure to tease her about (“Ha, unnie! You’re old but I’m taller than you,” she’d tease, resting her chin on Sejeong’s head).

Cue one of the other girls passing by and saying, “Oh thank God you’re back. Sejeong wouldn’t shut up about missing you.”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Somi tells Chaeyoung the news over FaceTime. It’s been a few years since Sixteen but she remains close as ever with Chaeyoung and the other unnies.

Chaeyoung’s eyes widen, her mouth forming an ‘O’. Excitedly, she says, “Wow, geez, congrats, Som! God, they won’t believe it when they hear this.”

The camera shakes a bit, and Somi hears choppy voices at the back. She barely makes out what Chaeyoung is telling the others with her but she has a good guess at what it is. When it refocuses, she sees that Chaeyoung has been joined by Nayeon and Jihyo.

“Oh my God,” Nayeon gasps, “Our little Somi’s all grown up!”

Jihyo smiles. “I never really thought I’d live to see the day you got a boyfriend or a girlfriend. But here it is.”

The other unnies flock to the camera after, crushing Chaeyoung in between them, all excitedly asking Somi about Sejeong.

“She’s great,” Somi replies in the end, smiling fondly. “Pretty damn great.”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“You two seem to be very close,” the MC comments, gesturing to Somi and Sejeong, who have their fingers interlocked.

Before either of the two can answer, Doyeon snickers, “Oh, they’re the _closest_.”

The other members throw their heads back in laughter while the MC attempts to piece together what’s so funny about it all.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


The other girls are supportive, almost unbelievably so. They’re everything Somi expects them to be -- the idiot friends that tease her and Sejeong a lot, snickering and always telling them to get a room when they catch them with their hands all over each other, as Yunjung puts it. They even poke fun at them during interviews, flustering the two just for shits and giggles.

But god so help them, they could only take so much.

Somi feels a little bad about it, a little embarrassed. She does feel bad when any of the girls walks in on them making out on the couch (“Jesus Christ,” Yoojung had exclaimed once, “We _sit_ on this couch! Have you no shame?”) or being so sickeningly sweet to each other (“I had to go to the doctor today to have my sugar levels checked,” Yunjung had said, cringing, “Just to make sure I didn’t get diabetes from you two”), always kissing each other and doing generally gross stuff. The worst is when Nayoung glares daggers at them, because Nayoung could definitely kill a man with just one look.

At the same time though, Somi doesn’t really have it in her to feel bad. It feels really nice when Sejeong kisses her -- she likes the kisses with teeth and tongue and nails digging into skin, but she loves the soft and gentle kisses too, those kisses “just because I miss you”. The stolen kisses, the surprise kisses, the fleeting kisses along her jaw and her neck. She loves how Sejeong kisses her, always so lovingly but with just the right bite to it. She likes that warm and fuzzy feeling she gets after a kiss and Sejeong looks at her like she’s the most beautiful thing in the world.

Somi likes the feeling of being loved. _Loved_ \-- it’s a big word, but she knows Sejeong loves her, she can see it in the certainty in her eyes, can feel it in every touch. It’s there on the tip of Sejeong’s tongue, on her lips: _I love you_.

Somi, well, she doesn’t know a thing about love. Has never been in love. But when Sejeong pulls her into a kiss and looks at her the way she does and her heart swells up a thousand times over in her chest, Somi figures that maybe this is love, or something like it.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Somi isn’t sure how Sejeong always manages to fall fast asleep on her bed but it isn’t entirely unwelcomed.

“We’ll see each other in the morning, unnie,” Somi says, trying hard not to give in to Sejeong’s puppy eyes. That in and of itself is a great feat. She rubs her eyes; she’s pretty sleepy too. “No need to be dramatic about it.”

Sejeong purses her lips. “I’m not being dramatic.”

“Yeah you are,” Somi replies, a sleepy smile tugging at her lips. “Besides, I need to sleep too.”

Sejeong sighs. “I miss you already.”

“You haven’t even left the room yet.”

“Exactly. That’s how much I miss you.”

Somi rolls her eyes but she still finds it adorable how Sejeong is just such a smitten puppy most times. “Fine,” she concedes. “You can stay a little longer.”

Sejeong’s eyes form crescents as her face eases into a grin and she plants a kiss on Somi’s cheek, which leads to her obnoxiously trying to kiss Somi all over the face, pushing her down on her bed. Somi squeals, whining “Unnie, stop!”, but her laughter is uncontrollable and she likes how obnoxious Sejeong is when it comes to her a little too much.

Their laughter and squeals die down and just like that, in a matter of a few minutes or even just a few seconds, the two of them fall asleep. Sejeong has her body pressed against Somi’s; Somi has hers curled around Sejeong’s, an arm wrapped around her waist and a leg thrown over one of Sejeong’s.

So maybe that’s how Sejeong always ends up falling asleep in Somi’s room (and how Sohye always has to relocate to another one of the girls’ rooms for the night).

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Somi loves waking up next to Sejeong, not just because she loves feeling the warmth of having another person beside her or because she likes the smell of Sejeong’s shampoo (she’d have to remember to ask her what shampoo she uses) or because Sejeong’s body fits so perfectly with hers -- though those are pretty damn great too.

She loves it because Sejeong loves whispering sweet nothings into her ear when they wake up, and Sejeong’s already low voice is even huskier from sleep, and it makes Somi weak in the knees, makes her feel a burning at the pit of her stomach.

They go to the dining table for breakfast and Somi’s cheeks are still flushed pink. Jieqiong gives her a once over and asks, “Do I wanna know why you look like that every morning?” Sohye chokes on her cereal.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


It’s inevitable that the girls get individual schedules when they’re off pop star duties. They still have a while before their next comeback, so in between recordings and meetings the members go on variety shows as MCs and guests and star in dramas. The works.

Sejeong is particularly busy, having been invited to become a host on another variety show for the time being. Somi has her own stuff to go about as well, appearing on all sorts of shows and the works. Needless to say, they see each other a little less than normal, and Somi feels a pang in her heart just thinking about it.

Sometimes Sejeong would come back home later than usual. Sometimes Somi would have to go right at the moment Sejeong arrives. There were times that they were only together during the night, when they slept, and in the morning, but only ever so briefly. On set, Somi misses Sejeong, misses the convenience of always being with the rest of I.O.I and thus always being with Sejeong.  She misses always having Sejeong holding her hands and resting her head on her shoulder and hugging her from behind.

She misses Sejeong. Period.

Sejeong probably has it worse than she does, always telling Somi through text about how much she misses her. People comment about how distracted Somi is sometimes (most times), but Somi uses the “oh well, she’s just a kid” card to get away with it, as bad as that sounds. But really, Somi just misses her girlfriend.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


So they fall into this new routine. Falling asleep together and waking up just to greet each other goodbye. Quick pecks on the lips before rushing to get to where they need to be. The dorm is almost desolate; almost everyone is busy on any given day, it’s unbelievable.

It’s around this time that both Sejeong and Somi become more irritable, more snappy. The others expect lashing out from Somi -- they expect her to be moody, to be typically teenager. They don’t expect it as much from Sejeong, who despite all the stress and burden dumped on her would still be able to walk away from it all with a bright smile that’s just bordering on manic. Put teenage angst and a ticking time bomb together and you get a disaster waiting to happen.

Sejeong and Somi have had their fair share of fights and arguments, usually over the smallest and pettiest of things. Celebrity status didn’t exempt them from relationship problems, as convenient as that would be. Usually they couldn’t go on for longer than a day without talking to each other without crawling back to one another, back to being grossly and sickeningly sweet.

The disaster hits the I.O.I dorm one evening when Sejeong suddenly comes storming out of Somi’s room, slamming the door behind her. The other girls are shocked into silence. Sejeong was rarely ever mad about anything, not even when she had all the reason in the world to be, so seeing her now, jaw clenched and lips curled into a snarl, the girls know that shit has really hit the fan.

In retrospect, it probably isn’t even something worth fighting about and not talking to each other for a week over. It starts with Sejeong whining about how they barely ever have time for each other now and how Somi barely gives her any attention sometimes on the rare occasions that they _are_ together. Somi assumes that maybe it’s the fatigue speaking but she snaps back at Sejeong, complaining about how clingy she can be. “God,” she grumbles, “It’s not like you’ll die without me.” Everything just nosedives from there and the two end up raising their voices at each other until Sejeong storms out and Somi is left clutching a pillow to her chest, incisors pressing down painfully into her lower lip as tears sting her eyes.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


The remainder of the week is a living hell for both Sejeong and Somi, and the other girls. Breakfast and dinner are terribly awkward, with Doyeon and Yoojung trying to lift up the mood with bad jokes and forced laughter; just being with a few feet of either Sejeong or Somi proves to be stressful and draining. The two would avoid each other completely, faces set to stony and cold expressions, and they were both so eerily quiet. There are times Somi would lash out and anything and everything; Sejeong spends most of her time at the dorm sulking.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


“You know,” Nayoung says one afternoon to Jieqiong, “I really can’t believe I’m saying this but I wish they’d just go back to always kissing each other in the face.”

Jieqiong sighs. “It’s far better than this hell we’ve been subjected to.”

It isn’t long before Yoojung breaks too, bursting into tears. Doyeon immediately pulls the smaller girl in for a hug, patting her head consolingly. “I just want them to make up already!” Yoojung wails. “They’re tearing this family apart!”

But if they think they have it bad, Somi has it worse. This is torture for her too. It’s the longest they’ve gone without talking to each other and it’s taken its toll on Somi both emotionally and physically. It’s draining to be so sad and it’s even more draining stubbornly trying to stay mad at Sejeong when all she wants to do is cuddle up against her again. She wonders if Sejeong feels the same way, looks for the answer in her eyes and feels a glint of hope when Sejeong’s eyes soften momentarily before the edge comes back.

By far, this is the longest week Somi has ever had in her entire life and she really just wants it to end. And she just wants Sejeong back.

It’s a Saturday morning when they finally make up. They find themselves face to face in the hallways, both reaching down to pick up their shoes for the day. The tension is still there and they both bite down on their tongues. It’s difficult, way too difficult, for Somi to keep this up any longer so wordlessly she throws her arms around Sejeong, mumbling “I’m sorry” against the older girl’s neck. “I miss you.”

Sejeong wraps her arms around Somi’s waist, says, “I’m sorry too.”

Behind them, Yoojung whoops, “ _Finally_!”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


The first time Sejeong tells Somi she loves her is when they sneak out of the dorm past one o’clock in the morning to take a stroll around the neighborhood. They both have hoodies on, baseball caps pulled low over their eyes. Fingers intertwined, they leisurely walk along the sidewalk, staying as close to each other as possible to absorb each other’s warmth. Walks like this have become a luxury for them, as have many of the simplest things like going to the grocery without having someone run up to you to ask you to sign their cabbage (they couldn’t even make that up if they tried) have become. Their individual schedules had slowed down considerably, allowing them more room to breathe.

At this time, all the other girls are either fast asleep or busy on their phones and laptops, all holed up in their rooms. Not that any of them could really care less about where Sejeong or Somi went; “each to her own” had become the prevalent rule since the start of individual activities and it worked well enough for all of them.

They walk aimlessly for an hour and a half, swinging their interlocked hands as they walk, footsteps coming to a halt when they reach the stoplight. They stand beneath the streetlight, waiting for the cars to pass and for the red light to turn to green. They remain silent, listening to the hum of car engines and the crunching of gravel under rubber tires, until Sejeong gives Somi’s hand a squeeze and says, “I’ve got something to tell you.”

Somi peers down at Sejeong, lashes casting faint shadows down her cheeks. “What is it, unnie?”

The stoplight switches from red to green and they begin to walk. Somi nudges Sejeong’s side with her elbow when Sejeong doesn’t reply. “Is something wrong?”

When they reach the other side of the road, Sejeong says, almost too easily as if it’s the simplest truth in the world, “I love you.”

Somi freezes on the spot. Her mind immediately goes back to when she had confessed to Sejeong that she liked her, the moment that started it all. _But that’s different_ , her mind tells her. Of course it’s different; telling someone you _like_ them and telling someone you _love_ them are on two completely different levels. Deep down, Somi had always been a little anxious about the day Sejeong finally says those three words, so certain and so full of conviction. Sejeong didn’t have to say them out loud for Somi to figure out that she does love her -- her actions are enough. Somi’s been anxious because she doesn’t know if she’ll be able to reply at all.

Sejeong watches her silently, waiting for her to say something, anything. Somi feels like her head is about to explode from all of the thoughts racing through her mind, feels her hands get a little clammy. _I love you_ , three simple words that held way too much meaning and burden than her nineteen-year-old self could fathom. But looking at Sejeong now, she feels a sense of calm wash over her, the kind that only Sejeong can make her feel. If Somi were to be honest, there’s a lot of things only the older girl could make her feel, always in extremes. She could make her so happy that Somi feels her heart could burst any minute but she could also frustrate her so much that it would drive Somi crazy. The good, the bad -- Somi wants it all as long as it’s with Sejeong, only wants Sejeong. _I guess that settles it, then_.

Somi might not know a whole lot about love, might not understand it in its entirety, but she does know that she loves Sejeong.

The corners of Somi’s eyes crinkle when she smiles and says, “I love you, too.”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


To be fair, Sejeong is the main cause of why the other girls are just a little too done with the two of them. It doesn’t help that she would sneak in mentions of Somi in almost every conversation. Doesn’t help that she just couldn’t stop saying “I love you” to Somi, especially when they had to go separate ways.

On Somi’s part, she probably shouldn’t keep blushing and whining “ _unnie_ ” all the time. It also doesn’t help that she’s picked up Sejeong’s habit of saying “I love you” all the damn time. But she loves saying it, admittedly. She loves the way her heart flutters when she tells Sejeong she loves her, loves knowing that Sejeong loves her too.

The other girls make faces, complaining about how gross they are, about how they seriously need to go get a room (“preferably not any room within this dorm because God knows how you’ll find a way to defile it”), but even then they can’t completely hide their fondness for the two under the snide comments.

Yunjung whispers to Mina, “I didn’t say this, but I actually think it’s cute how obnoxious they are with each other.”

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Marie Claire features I.O.I for another spread, their third one now with the magazine since their debut and the finale of Produce 101. They get all caked up, get their hair done, pose before the flashing cameras and head off to be interviewed for the magazine. The answers are all well-rehearsed but not inauthentic, just as the way all idols are trained to answer. They’re asked all the usual questions, nothing really new. The interviewer turns to Somi last, voice recorder in one hand and a small notebook with questions jotted down in the other. The questions are pretty generic, mostly focusing on how she’s grown since debuting with I.O.I at fifteen, such a formative and often volatile point of adolescence, and all the changes that have come with it.

“So tell us,” the interviewer says, leaning forward in her seat. “Have you ever fallen in love?”

“This question again?” Somi quips, though she feels her face heat up. She laughs. “That’s all anyone ever seems to ask me nowadays.”

“Come on,” the interviewers urges, “Is there anyone you’re interested in, at least? You’ve bloomed gracefully and I hear there are a number of guys trying to win your affection.”

“Oh yeah?” Sejeong butts in, a smile on her face but a certain edge in her voice. Somi bites the inside of her cheek to stop herself from laughing. “Mind naming a few?”

The other girls join in before the interviewer gets the hint; they laugh, with Nayoung adding, “We’re very protective of our maknae.” She scrunches her nose at Somi, wagging her finger at her playfully. “So no dating yet!”

Nayoung lightly scolds Sejeong when they get in the company car on the way home. “I couldn’t help it,” Sejeong mumbles, burying her face in Somi’s neck. Somi’s lips curl into a fond grin.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Sejeong scoots closer to Somi during breakfast the next morning, her lips turned down in a scowl. “Are you _sure_ there isn’t anyone hitting on you?”

“Oh my _God_ ,” Chungha groans, and the others throw their heads back in laughter.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Somi turns twenty the summer of that year. With it comes this sense of adulthood; she is no longer a teenager (not even when the other girls treated her like one, still), no longer a girl. She has officially entered womanhood.

Her twentieth birthday brings in new realizations. Or maybe they aren’t so much realizations but things she had always known but had never dared to completely explore before, held back by how young she is. But she isn’t a kid, not anymore, and if she’s going to be completely honest, she’s thought about sleeping with Sejeong for a while now. She had always seen it in Sejeong’s eyes when they were together in a clash of lips and teeth and tongue, always known that Sejeong probably wanted it too. And it’s not like Somi can control what she thinks of all the time, especially when they’re together. The most she had ever done is slip a hand under Sejeong’s shirt and maybe she wanted to do much more than that.

 _A lot_ more than that.

So she becomes more brazen, more assertive than she already is. It takes Sejeong by surprise at first, but by the looks of it, she likes it. Once, she leaves a ring of hickeys on Sejeong’s neck for all the world to see and it was just their luck that they had to appear on live television the next day. Sejeong had to wear a turtleneck shirt in the sweltering heat and Nayoung had all but chucked her water bottle at Somi to wipe the smirk off of her face.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


For the most part, it does have its intended effect. It elicits the heavy breaths and throaty groans she wants, a little too much sometimes that she has to tell Sejeong to pipe down because everyone else was asleep. Still, Somi is more than disappointed that Sejeong just can’t seem to get the hint, or if she does, then she doesn’t do a thing about it. Maybe being subtle (if this could even be considered as being subtle) isn’t the right approach.

Now, Somi goes for a more direct, straightforward and honest-to-God approach. They’re sitting at the couch, all alone for the afternoon, when Somi initiates the kissing, starting with kisses to Sejeong’s neck and along her jawline -- the kisses Sejeong loved so much -- before moving to kiss her on her open mouth. The re-run they had been watching on the television is but background noise. The kiss gets heated, both of them with their hands on each other, when Somi tugs at Sejeong’s shirt, pulling it up with one hand, the other dangerously close to the waistband of Sejeong’s shorts; she feels Sejeong frown into the kiss before pulling away suddenly. Brows furrowed, she exclaims, “Somi, _what the hell_?”

Somi figures now is a good time to just say it. Her face still flushed, lips still kiss-swollen, she says breathily, “Unnie, I’d be lying if I said I haven’t thought of it.”

Sejeong stares at her, confusion written all over her face. “Thought of wh-” she starts until it hits her and her own face turns a very deep shade of red.

Somi wishes the ground would just swallow her whole and never spit her back out. Even getting run over by a truck seemed easier. She had envisioned this moment a little differently, planned for her delivery to be a little less embarrassing. She stammers in English, “I-I wouldn’t mind sleeping with you”, as if that’ll save her from all her embarrassment that she’s already six feet under. Sejeong’s eyes widen, as if hearing it in Korean wasn’t bad enough and now she had to hear it in English too. Somi buries her head in her hands, her face so hot she could probably fry an egg on it. An awkward silence follows and Somi wonders what made her think this was such a great idea. Why she ever let her hormones speak for her is beyond her at this point. She peeks in between her fingers at Sejeong and she’s surprised to find her smiling at her, amused. Softly, Somi says, “Well this was definitely not how I imagined all of this to go down.”

Sejeong leans closer to her and she lifts her head from her hands. Sejeong fondly pats Somi’s cheeks, eyes forming crescents as she smiles and says, “You’re so cute when you’re flustered.”

Somi pouts, crossing her arms over her chest. “I just told you I wanna sleep with you and that’s all you have to say. ”

Sejeong’s smile wavers a bit, and Somi catches the corner of her lip twitch just the slightest. “Yeah, no. You’re still too young.”

“I’m _twenty_ , unnie, not five and half!”

“It’s just, you’re a...” Sejeong replies, pursing her lips as she tries to find the right word. When she does find it, she smiles crookedly. “You’re a _baby_ , Som.”

Somi frowns. “I’m your girlfriend and you call me a _baby_.”

Sejeong laughs at that and she leans in to press her lips to Somi’s cheek. She pats Somi on the head consolingly, like _aww too bad, maybe next time, kiddo._ “How about we get some ice cream to make you feel better?”

Somi wants to kick herself for perking up the way she does, the way she would always perk up excitedly when her dad took her out to get ice cream and milkshakes after school, especially after making such a fool of herself, but hey. No one’s too old for ice cream.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Come August, they celebrate Sejeong’s birthday. It’s a small and private affair; Somi takes out the cake from the fridge, lighting the candles, while Yunjung leads the singing.

When the singing comes to an end, the cake placed in front of Sejeong, Somi wraps her arms around Sejeong’s neck from behind. “Happy birthday, unnie,” she greets and then kisses her. “I love you!”

Later, Somi jokes about how old Sejeong is, kissing Sejeong’s pout away.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


It isn’t long before they start preparing for their next comeback. It’s a full album this time, so hours spent at the recording studio are longer and every day on their calendars is marked full. Their sense of time is distorted as night blends into day and day into night. It’s inevitable that they catch a cold or go down with fever because of fatigue. There are a few sprained ankles here and there from dance practice, lost voices and scratchy throats from hours spent belting it out to perfection.

A month into preperations for their comeback, YMC tells them they’ll be holding their first ever concert in honor of their fourth anniversary as a group. More stress, in short. The concert will be held at one of the biggest concert domes in Seoul, so they ought to be at their best when they perform. Somi can imagine it already: a sea of thousands of faces, light sticks raised and their shouts loud enough to drown out even the dome’s impressive and state of the art audio system. Somi feels excitement course through her veins, feels her heart leap at the thought. This is something she’s dreamed of for so long, and now it’s finally happening.

The best part of it all is that now she has Sejeong by her side to live out this dream and so much more.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Their comeback is a success, their single achieving a PAK the week it’s realeased digitally. The views on their music video also skyrocket within just a few hours and the announcement of their upcoming concert sends the fans and the internet into a frenzy and a flurry of people rushing to buy tickets. Somi gets a text from Chaeyoung congratulating her and I.O.I on their success, promising that she and the rest of Twice will be there at their concert to cheer her on.

“And tell your special lady we say hi as well!” Chaeyoung says at the end of her text, a winking emoji beside it.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


The day of the concert is as crazy as Somi had expected it to be. The dressing room is a frenzy of stylists and racks of outfits and hairspray. Tacked on a cork board is their hastily written setlist, the manila paper crumpled just a little -- their songs over the years, a few nods back at their Produce 101 days (with the quintessential ‘Pick Me’ topping it all off), solo performances here and there. They’re an two hours into the concert, and there’s a sheen layer of sweat on Somi’s skin and she’s rushing to get changed into the next outfit before the VCR comes to an end and they have to get back up to sing. They breeze through the outfit changes and get back on stage shortly after.

Somi’s seen a few of their friends back from Produce 101 as well as Twice at the front rows. She even spots their Produce 101 mentors, proud smiles plastered on their faces. Somi waves and blows flying kisses to their way, her heart swelling with joy, touched by their presence.

It overwhelms Somi -- the thousands of people cheering and shouting their names, light sticks and banners raised, the love and adoration they have for these eleven girls who all had a shared dream and are fortunate enough to live it out together. It overwhelms her as much as it excites her, to the point of almost paralyzing her; Sejeong squeezes her hand reassuringly, smiling brightly and breathlessly, and Somi feels the jitters go away.

The first round of solo performances are done -- Sejeong starts it off with a ballad that transitions to a rock song with the roar of electric guitars (Somi could barely contain her own shouts and excitement backstage and damn did Sejeong look good in that leather jacket), and Chungha brings it to a close with a powerful dance performance, bringing the entire crowd to its feet -- so it’s time for the second round. Chaeyeon walks up on stage and Somi gives her two thumbs up, wishes her good luck. Somi waits her turn -- she’s up next -- the bass of the background music reverberating through and shaking her insides. Nervousness starts to gnaw at her, her shoulders tensing, until she feels two hands on her waist, familiar and welcome. She turns around and smiles.

“Nervous?” Sejeong asks her. She’s in a plain white shirt and shorts, hair and make-up half made.

Somi nods, tugging nervously at the hem of her shirt. “It’s kinda hard not to be.”

“You have no reason to be,” Sejeong replies confidently and it warms Somi’s heart. “You’ll do great, you’ll be amazing.”

“What makes you so sure? I mean, what if I mess up?”

“It doesn’t matter if you mess up. You’ll be amazing nonetheless.”

Somi beams down at her. “What did I ever do to deserve such a great girlfriend?”

Sejeong grins. “I should be the one asking myself that about you.”

“God, now I see why the others can’t stand us sometimes,” Somi jokes, scrunching her nose in mock disgust. “We’re pretty damn gross.”

“The grossest,” Sejeong replies in mock seriousness. Then they both laugh.

It dawns on Somi just how far she and Sejeong have come. From MNet’s persistence on making them come off as rivals on Produce 101 (and Sejeong’s blatant refusal to go with it), to debuting together in I.O.I, to where they are now -- they’ve definitely gone through a lot as individuals and together. Somi had never imagined that she’d love someone as much as she loves Sejeong, never imagined that anyone could ever look at her and love her the way Sejeong does. There have been ups and downs in their relationship, good and bad and sometimes even terrible, but to Somi, it’s worth it all. Somi doesn’t know a whole lot of people who get to live their dream and be able to do so side by side with the person they love; she’s just one of the lucky ones.

Chaeyeon’s performance is almost up, the song down to its last minute and a half. Somi looks around quickly before she leans down to press her lips to Sejeong’s, trying to convey as much of her love, adoration and gratefulness as she can through it.  She breaks the kiss and says, choking up just a little bit, “I love you.”

The roar of the audience signals that it’s Somi’s turn up on stage. Chaeyeon returns from the stage, sweaty and panting and with a huge grin on her face. She claps Somi on the shoulders, says “Break a leg”, and heads off to get changed. “I guess that’s my cue to get on stage,” Somi says to Sejeong.

Sejeong grins. “Go get ‘em, number one.”

Somi can’t help herself so she pecks Sejeong on the lips one last time, then says, “Oh, we’re having dinner with my parents next Saturday, by the way”. The last thing Somi sees before turning around to get on stage is horror written all over Sejeong’s face.

**Author's Note:**

> re: the roommates, i wrote this before finding out they actually are in the same room but alas i am lazy and i don’t wanna change it now so let’s just imagine that they switched rooms or something lol
> 
> comments and kudos are much appreciated ♡


End file.
